POST 22 Gonna Keep on Tryin….

stevie….Till I Reach My Higher Ground.

Hallelujah! Our finances have been elevated! What essential documentation did the bank ask us for this week  to reach these dizzying, dazzling heights?

  1. Since the stamped, signed receipt we provided from prepayment of our real estate taxes was not acceptable, we obtained a verification from the County Assessor that our tax balance was zero.
  2. Since Central Document Review only now discovered  a gap in the 35 page document the bank had requested and received two months ago, we provided the missing page 19.
  3. Since the 20 page document verifying our homeowners insurance was not complete enough, we submitted a copy of the premium payment.

The net result is we have been escalated by the regional sales manager to the fast-track! No one will say exactly what that means, and I question the logic of the bank telling we are being fast-tracked after the timeline for approval has already been exceeded, but you gotta’ love life in the fast lane. Can you feel the whiplash?

With the weekend starting I don’t expect any new action from the bank, but with today being 9/11, and with Rosh Hashannah almost upon us, it is a good time to slow down, give remembrance and give thanks. So whether it is Stevie Wonder or the Red Hot Chili Peppers who fire your soul, join us in wishes for peace and a good year ahead.

Play on.rhcp

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POST 17 I Will Never Let a Banker in My Life

rexI really did not plan on writing a blog entry today. But three phone calls from the bank put me in need of some therapeutic creativity. So with all apologies to Lerner and Loew, here is my homage to my favorite musical, My Fair Lady and the incomparable Rex Harrison.

For those of you not familiar with the musical or the song, you can find it on YouTube here :

Never Let a Woman in Your Life

And Now

I Will Never Let a Banker in My Life

I’m just a new home building man
Who desires nothing more than just an ordinary loan
To get exactly what I need to build in Thorngate my new home
A working man am I, with top notch credit score
Who likes to live his life, with pets and wife
Never would think to ever ask for more
Well, just a new home building man

But, let a banker in your life
And your timeline is all through
He will complicate your plan, never mind where you began
For more forms he will go trawling, roping and then stalling, you

You want to get the darn thing over
He wants you to sign some more
You see that interest rates are rising
He laughs at what he’s got in store

I’m a level headed man
Get along with all my colleagues, you will never hear me swear
I like to tell the truth and think that I treat other people fair
A happy man am I, deal well with work and play
I would never moan, never groan
Never would let a dark cloud blot my day
An easy going man

But, let a banker in your life
And it’s time to have a fit
First they say that all is well, then drag you through living hell
They will say they need more time, they’ll tell you their bank is fine, but it’s all shit!
Let a banker in your life
Let a banker in your life
I will never let a banker in my life!

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And don’t get me started on my lawyer!